Mom, I have ankles in my hair–can you brush them out for me?

Simon, 3

(Hands flying to cover nose) Mom! Your breath! What did you eat? (Takes hands away) I can’t feel my fingers.
Dylan, 8

Oh! Man! My heart is beeping hard!

Hugo, 6

I wish there were no such thing as words. Then we could move our bodies and hit people when we need to work things out.

Hazel, 4

Mommy, are you sure you remember how to make a baby?

Terrel, 4

Mommy, this half of me is Mexican and this half is regular.

Jacob, 5

Mom, your boobies are flip-flappy — they go like this.

Ian, 3

(shaking head from side to side)

Mom, it is so wrong that we wipe our bottoms with trees. Trees and bottoms do not go together.

Beka, 5

(after leaving a restroom)

*muffled noises followed by mad giggling*

Whoooweee, you do NOT want to go in there!

Tosh, 9

I like being a girl, because boys have those wiggly things!

Mini-me, 6